It has finally happened - the thing I feared would happen since the day I decided to be banded. My husband is freaking out. Yesterday was our 12 year wedding anniversary and we had planned to go to NYC on Saturday night. Instead, when I got home, I found a neighbor in our kitchen and my husband cooking. My kids and the neighbor's kids were downstairs playing. And I was confused - weren't we going out to dinner? Obviously my husband had other plans.
So the next morning, on our actual anniversary, I ask "What was that about last night? Weren't we going to go to dinner in the city?" And his response was "What for? You can't even enjoy it." Surely, he's kidding. But no, he feels like this. He is starting to realize how much I have changed my eating habits and he is freaking out. Human beings eat to celebrate. If I can't eat, then why celebrate right? WRONG. Men suck sometimes. I still would have liked to put on a dress (that fits me better) and slapped on some high heels and hit the town. Sure, I would have eaten an appetizer and drank a glass instead of a bottle of wine, but I would have been able to celebrate, right?
Sounds like my hubby is a few steps behind me in this adjustment. He brought up again today that he always thought I was beautiful and that I did not need to loose weight for him. To which I kindly replied, as I always do, thank you - you have no idea how much that means to me. BUT IT DOES NOT CHANGE HOW I FEEL - I want to be the funny girl or the smart girl - not the heavy girl in the red dress. Thank you husband for not caring - but I still do.
I knew these issues would come - I am prepared for them. He's too much of a keeper not to get him back on board. He'll see..... ;)
I'm sorry your Annie didn't go as planned. I am in NYC right now on vacation and I just started to think about these changes and my husband. I want to still enjoy food with him and I don't want there to be issues of him feeling abandoned or angry. You'll get through. It's like you said, you're a few steps ahead of him. You do the planning...get that dress on and take him out.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry your plans didn't work out. Hubs will come around - perhaps you just need to work this out gently with him. It takes time for each of us to adjust to these kind of changes - but in the long run they're worth it! He'll begin to understand it all as he sees you happy and healthier! And Amanda is right! Put that dress on and take HIM out!
ReplyDeleteLisa
(Mrs C)